I’ve talked about this before, I think it’s significant enough to reiterate.
STOP using ‘buzzwords’ to label someone else’s mental health in order to suit your personal agenda. STOP doing this in order to paint someone else in a negative light so that others can see them the way you want them to. STOP believing that if you have googled and read a couple of articles, that you are a diagnostician armed with all the knowledge you need.
Perhaps you were married to a REAL narcissist. You know first hand that this is a very different picture of someone who has a few narcissistic tendencies (we all do). Perhaps you were raised by someone with BPD (I was). This is not the same as being raised by someone who is occasionally prone to being selfish. Perhaps your child has a substance abuse disorder. You know the pain firsthand. Still, be cautious of the natural human tendency to believe everyone else’s experience is the same as or even similar to your own.
If you have lived and loved someone who struggles with mental illness, you know the power of labels. If you are the person who has experienced a mental health struggle, you know how it feels to have a label define you. Stereotypes stink.
If you haven’t walked in either of those shoes, there but for the grace of God go you. Be cognizant and kind for Heaven’s sake. There are strong consequences attached to doing anything else.
Finally, if you are in the mental health profession, STOP using buzzwords to support all that you are projecting from your own experiences. DO NO HARM stands whether your opinion and education are strong or not. Your feelings are not necessarily fact. Being in the field does not designate you as an unblemished judge of character; and friends…we are ALL blemished. Also, if you are in the mental health field, hold yourself to a higher standard, please. You represent a field people are already cautious of yet are greatly needed. Be trustworthy. Character assassination based on opinion or for any other reason is usually pretty unethical.￼. Utilizing tools that your education and experience has offered you to ruin somebody was never part of the deal when you became a mental health professional; if it was, you might have some work to do￼
I watched a real narcissist in action recently and my stomach hurt. My stomach hurt for the narcissist because I believe there is a big ole unhealed wound inside of them that never healed and likely never will (not like a narcissist to come to the point that they believe they need help…it’s part of the disorder). My stomach hurt for that person’s children and for the person they were once married to. This was real and consequences on all sides are traumatic.
Use your brain before you decide to act and especially before you attack.